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433 No. 433 watch
Tags: rape, M/f, m/f, F/f, M+/m, MM/f, fsolo, mc, ScFi(ish)

Blurb: Renee is a (physically) fourteen year-old "synthetic human." Bought by a man who sees her as little more than a sexual plaything, she struggles to retain her identity- and her determination- as her free will dwindles away.

I suck at writing summaries.

But some people seem to like my tale, anyways.

-Let the Massive Reposting Commence-

Claude grinned to himself when he first spotted the girl. She was all he could have asked for - and had. Madame Therese's specialized in the production of made-to-order synthetics. Want one who worships the ground you tread on? Or maybe one who detests you? Or more, one with a pathological fear of the opposite sex? Girls and boys in every shape, size, color. Any feature you could want. Every one with her own unique personality and characteristics.

Even with the tanks, though, it took some time for them to grow. Claude had waited three years for his.

She shifted from tiny foot to tiny foot at the station, peering nervously at the passerby. She thought she was waiting for her uncle's chauffeur. Therese's allowed you to customize their memories, if you wanted. Most customers chose to simply pick the characteristics, then allow the story-editors to do the rest.

But Claude had wanted to own his girl completely. He wanted more than her emotions - he needed her soul.

Her name was Renee D'Aubigne. Her parents had died when she was an infant, leaving her to the care of a nearby convent for the first fourteen years of her life. She'd a rebellious nature, which had led to more than one confrontation with the Sisters. She was strong for her age, and active. Her favorite foods were apples and raspberries. She had never met any males, and from what she had heard of them, they were something to be avoided. She knew of sex in an abstract sort of way, simply that anyone who was involved with it - at least, according to the sisters - was polluted.

A few weeks ago, a shocking discovery had been made - Renee was not an orphan. A single uncle, mistakenly filed as 'deceased,' was, in fact, alive. After learning of his relative wealth, the convent had presented him with a bill for the years of care given, and more for its continuation. He had politely declined the offer, choosing instead to take care of the girl himself.

Renee, along with her meager possessions, had been packed away and sent off, despite her protests. She'd fallen asleep on the ride to the shuttle. At this point, the sim ended. The operators had sedated, disengaged, and transported her to the real shuttle. She'd arrived at the station alone, with only a Sister's hurried instructions to guide her.

Claude watched as she clutched her small bag a bit more tightly whenever a man hustled past. Her jet black hair curled over her shoulders, to the small of her back. It'd been designed to never tangle, and it shined brilliantly in the afternoon light. More than one man found his gaze upon her lithe form, and she glared fiercely until they turned away.

He took one last sip of his mix, and sauntered over to the girl.

"Renee D'Aubigne?" He asked her back.

She flinched and spun around. "Who is asking?"

Claude grinned. He had specified 'bold'... "Claude Montague. Your uncle, I believe?"

"Oh!" She shook her head. "I'm sorry, sir. Pleased to meet you."

Claude stared at her hand for a moment. "Quite." He turned without shaking. "If you'll follow me..."

She rushed to follow his long stride.
391 posts omitted. Last 50 posts shown. Expand all images
>> No. 8718
i love you aplgirl!!!!
>> No. 8724
And if anyone wants to crit the story, that would be helpful. :D

Random comment responses! :D

>Also, extremely awesome that you're studying the sciences. I'm working on a degree in physics, myself. What field do you intend to get into?
I was going into the medical field, but I shall soon be switching my major to something fluffier.

>>The Yank
>FINALLY!!! I missed this story so much, and you have now spurred me on to write more on my own! Now i do like the sawyer character (mainly for his resemblance to myself) But why is he so fuckin stupid? ok maybe thats an exageration, but seriously, he has to at least have an idea of what zack is doing, and i want sawyer to beat his face in with a baseball bat so badly. The AI was a nice surprise, and definetly a variable that makes the story's outcome even more uncertain. I do hope your next update doesnt take as long as this one has, but i must say that it was worth the wait. oh, and MOAR!!!!!
Sauce is not exactly stupid, he's just naive. And Zack knows him well enough to reassure him. Since we're in Renee's perspective, we aren't seeing the conversations they have at school, and etc.

>How far in the story are we do you think? The only reason I'm asking is because of the childish dream that it will last forever, but I imagine that would be tough to write after a while.
I've got some ideas of what I'd do for a sequel, but, after this is finished I will probably take a break. I've got a buncha other stories in my head.

>Either way, this is an awesome story and I look forward to reading the rest. I'll also use this chance to say that I hope you consider writing more stories in general. I'd read them regardless if they're /elit/ material or not.
Thanks. :D

> Terribly great story here. It's starts out blazing hot, pushing all of my favorite buttons, but after a while you start to see Renee as being more and more real. Congratulations. You have made me fall so in love with a character that I can't fap to the thought of her being raped or suffering.
Yay for empathy!

And if you think it's hard to read to all the horrible stuff, imagine me. I wrote it, and now I get random moments of, did I seriously do that to her?. Holy crap, I'm an awful person. ;_; all day.

>aplgirl this is, without a doubt, the best /elit/ story I have ever seen.
>At the beginning it was erotic, arousing, something to jack off to. However it's not like that for me anymore.
>I read this story now and, while erotic in parts, I do not want to jack off to it anymore. This is because I fell in love with Renee as a character. I read this story now because it is a fucking good story, not because it's erotic.
>None of this is criticism. You are an amazing writer. You have created a story that goes beyond the usual content of /elit/ and has become something of a novel.
Thank you. It started off the same way for me, then seemed to become more story-oriented, too.

>>King of Idiots
>(predictions)
Heheheheh. Predictions are awesome. Can't confirm/deny any of them, but they were fun to read.

>>The Storyteller
>I don't know about the underage b&, but...
<_<

>>tomcavaliar
>There are publishers who print rape stories for their erotic value. However, it's like webcam pics of college guys' dicks: there are more women writing the stuff than publishers who want it, which is why it's all over the net for free. Paying to self publish to "get your name out there" is probably not ever going to make you more money than it costs.
Yeah, I would not self-publish, and I would not particularly want my name "to get out there" on this story.


>i don't believe your "i am busy" shit. the people who say that are generally the ones who browse myspace for hours or spend their time gaining experience for their level 9001 warlock.
k

>>King and Cowboy
Thanks for defendin' my honor, guys. Heheh.

>>Blackheart Clockwork
>Anyway, I am slightly down that Aplgirl did not comment on my Of Mice And Men reference, but hey, can't win em al, right?
I have not read Of Mice and Men.

>That one made me cry...
>Anyway, holy shit this is probably the best 'erotic' story I've read in...ever.
I'm glad you like it, even if it made you cry. :)

>I'm not really one for happy endings myself, but the whole Simon-Renee story stirs a hidden romanticism in me which I thought was long dead so... I kinda wanna see Simon again soon... so just waiting eagerly for your next update
Sorry ya had to wait so long. Glad to know the chans haven't completely wiped the empathy out of anonymous.

>aplgirl you are amazing at writing, I usually never read story posts that often but this has had me checking non stop for when the next update is, please keep up the good work, and I really hope there's a happy ending for Renee and Simon.
Thanks. I hope the ending will please you.
(And sorry you've waited for an update for forever >_<)

>>Sapphire
>Really, really hot. I hope she finds Simon soon! Reunion sex = full of win.
>I also hope that bastard is caught and Sauce deletes him from Renee's ownership registry ;x
XD

>tl;dr. i DO NOT WANT your job.
Ohhh. Hahah. Got it.

>>Static
>So...
>I like it.
>the one thing that has really disappointed me-
>and I'm wondering if any other faithful readers have made the connection-
>is the fact that the logic bomb that Renee dropped on Claude was exactly the same that the VICKY computer in I. ROBOT. (starring Will Smith) used as an excuse to kill all the humans.
>(My theory is that this results in the Matrix trilogy)
>So what I'm wondering is:
>a) Has this same robot-cheating-rules idea been used by Sci-fi writers throughout the ages?
>or
>b) Is this actually an encrypted and subtle reference to THE FRESH PRINCE OF BEL AIR?
Robot cheating rules have been used for ages. I don't read a ton of sci-fi, so I've only encountered it a bit, but logic-ing your way out of something is a classic move.
As for b- ... -_- ... You guys have got to stop thinking everything is about Bel-air.

>>Sniffits
>As far as I understand, that particular logic bomb has been used by computer A.I. throughout sci fi history as I read it in a few other novels and series long before I read I,Robot.
>What makes it interesting is that Renee thinks like a human, not a computer. Though, a good point has been made.
Right.

>>Chibi
>The "Logic Bomb" that you speak of is actually Isaac Asimov's Three laws that were developed in 1942. Since then they have been adapted into many different movies, books, shows, etc :)
Yes. Though I've only ever read I, Robot; not his other ones.

>>Sniffits
>Although Renee thinks like a human, the command system that controls her is artificial- essentially that would mean that any order from a master following the lines of `protect from all future harm`, the process would send her to kill the instructor- whether she wanted to or not, because she had been commanded to.
She is only controlled by herself. There isn't like, a guardian program over her shoulder all of the time. If she starts looking for loopholes, she will be bound to find them, and capable of using them. But she has to actually believe that's the command she's following.

>You should consider writing some non erotic stuff, I think it could get printed. This is very good. I ended up really getting into it, so I look forward to your update!
:D I do write some non-erotic stuff.

>Read the whole thing, and I get just a little bored when you go from one guy raping Renee to them taking turns raping Renee, then finally someone else rapes Renee and the focus shifts to raping a different syn.
Sorry ya got bored. :(

>>Raevyn
>Just thought I'd say, I loved it. I loved it like 3 months ago when I first found it. I'm glad to know you aren't, you know, dead or something..
>you rock. Good storyline. I'm female and I definitely LOVE Renee. She'd be like me if I was in that position (positions? :o )
>Anyway, I'm so happy there was an update ^_^ Can't fuckin' wait for the next segment. You rock.
>Keep on keepin' on.
Glad to know some fellow chicks dig this. :D

>Is there a happy ending?
Keep reading, and you'll see.

>>;_;
>mother of god
>i cant wait for updates!

>im REALLY into the story
>zack is starting to piss me right the fuck off
>he needs to gtfo so i can stop banging my head against my desk every time he treats her like a mindless sex bot
>i seriously want to reach into this story and pew pew pew zack until he asplodes
>knowing hes there makes me depressed as shit
>;(
>renee needs to find simooonnnn and help him escape so they can start a farm with sheep and kittens and plants :D!
>also, <3 aplgirl ;o
Thanks. :D I hope you'll keep a'readin'.

>This story is incredible. I've read plenty of books, and only one has come close to the gripping and tugging of my emotions as much as yours. I check daily, just to make sure I don't miss an update.
>I have no advice, just keep doing what you're doing, it's fantastic.
Sorry I haven't been getting updates out, daily. >_<
Oh, and to echo >>6441 , what book did tug your emotions a bunch?

>Amazing story, I've never felt so much emotion for certain characters as I have from reading this. The anger I felt from reading the parts with the synthetic masters, to the happy tingly feeling I got whenever Renee was away from them. I'm really loving where it's going with Sauce and Zack (hopefully he gets killed off soon :D)
>Anywho, keep up the great work, I can't wait to read your updates.
>You really should be getting paid for this.
I would love to get paid for this.

>The logic bomb was flawed, because Renee had to listen to a direct order. A direct order to drop the knife was given, therefore BLAH.
'Primary' commands trump-
Oh.
>i felt like the whole logic bomb thing was weak, but, if i remember correctly, claude's order that she keep all hurt from him was a primary command, so i would assume that would override his order for her to drop the knife.
^ what he said.
And I am sorry you found it weak.

>If I remember correctly, the "drop the knife" command was given after Renee had fucked up the computer system and had no effect because of that.
Fucking up the computer just did a few things. It kept Claude from being able to access her 'controls,' and it meant she didn't immediately shut down when he died.

>>Gimme Gimme Moar Moar
>What the hell is wrong with you! How dare you write this epic story and then just die for a few weeks. WE NEED MOAR!
College. :/

>*revs chainsaw sword* I never thought I'd have to resort to this, but Zack has gone too far. His utter existence is the sticky tar of writer's block the plagues the mind of one of my favorite writers...
>And by that I mean his nature has caused plot twists unforseen even by the author herself, and thus have dampened progress.
>So. I'm gonna kill him. *mounts scope on the back of the sword*
Zack isn't blocking me.

>no updates in a month lol
lol

>If this was a book, I'd buy it for anything under 100$, just to support the continuation of this godly story, KEEP IT UP! I'm glad the Claude part is over, it was starting to get repetitive (I read this WHOLE thing in one day.
Thanks. :D
Yeah, reading this all at once might make that part get repetitive. :/

>omg, i started reading this just for the fappin' like most of you but now I really want to know what happens next (but keep the sex going too). I so want Renee to take advantage of innocent Sawyer XD.
hehehehe

>>Blackwork Clockheart
>I read something somewhere about a girl who was raped, and then this nice guy helps her to regain her humanity and they fall in love and live on for better or worse.
>But it was like, "No, kisses are supposed to be painful, not like this..." And how all her "romantic" and "sexual" preceptions were ruined because her step father, that was it, was raping her on a daily basis. I think that Sawyer should be the one to help her rediscover her quasi-humanity, because after all, like he said, she's a human, with just a few more parts.
>But then again, Aplgirl already has a plan for where this is going (I can only hope Simon turns out to be a Lenny, see(>>3863>>3772>>3711>>3707) these posts for my musings) and we're just along for the ride. It's just more like a train or a bus than a car or plane. More stops for things other than fuel, and plenty of people getting onboard and off.
Why do you want Simon to be a Lenny? o_O

>The part with Renee and Simon together was beautiful. I'm not really a fan of romance, so my judgement is somewhat limited, but the only tragic love I've read of that has moved me as much is the end of The Amber Spyglass.
That book made me cry. :(

>>The Yank
>Screw you two! I know how hard it is to write updates, and how long it can take just to work up the motivation just to sit down at the computer and write. If you cant wait patiently for good elit like a hungry child would for soup then GTFO! Y'know what happens to uppity children in orphanages? they starve.
>As for you aplgirl, take all the time you need to write, i know college is an ass kicker seeing as how its my freshmen year as well. But look at it this way, you're story got STICKIED! thats an honor reserved for the best of the best! the creme' de la fucking creme'! Your story puts most others to shame when it comes to sheer immersion in the main character and the originality of your world. I personally would wait more than a year for another update on Renee.
Thanks, though I hope it doesn't take a year between updates. ^_^

>um.. there is nothing original about this story. seriously, havent you people read anything the japanese make?
I have not. And I couldn't find a summary or anything on wikipedia. Link?
And, I got the base idea for this story from the book Altered Carbon, by Richard K. Morgan. It is a good sci-fi noir kickass story.It's only similarity to this story is that in it, human bodies can be custom made.

>This is one of the best stories I have ever read. It is for fapping, yet I find myself caring for the heroine. I keep hoping for Renee to find a way to finally live happily but if that happens then the whole premise of the story is destroyed. Good story but I don't see how you could possibly end it happily.
Just keep a'readin'.

>>The Storyteller
>This disagreement stops right now. The next person to try and continue this disagreement in any way, shape or form in this or any other thread gets banned.
>The only posts I want to see in this thread from this point onwards are from aplgirl either to update the story or to respond to any constructive comments/criticisms that you the readers might choose to leave for her here.
Thanks. :)

>This better not be a bel-air
...

>The plot is pretty good. I just empathize with Renee and feel so sorry for her.
>I'm not really into rape and all, but fapped anyway... 4 times...
Thanks. :)
Glad you aren't into rape, heheh.

>Hell, rape isn't even one of my turn-ons, but I still can't stop reading this because it's just such a damn good story. Keep it up :D
I hope to.

>It maybe just me but I feel like the story maybe following White Fang's overall plot.
I read White Fang in like, fifth grade, so I can't remember it too well. I don't think I am following its plot, though. o_O

>Also, is anyone compiling all this stuff on some website somewhere? It'd be great to have this stuff archived.
http://archive.elitter.net/wiki/Renee

>When I first started reading this, it felt a lot like 120 days of sodom.
>As time passed, the author did a great job turning the sexual-object we were introduced to into a main character.
Unlike 120 Days of Sodom, I'm not really into excessive filth and mutilation.
And I'm not going to die in the middle of the story and have the rest be a summary.

>Holy flux, this took forever to finish but it's so good, that I actually had the attention span to finish. XD
Excellenttt. :D
>> No. 8725
Dear god even the comment reply posts are too long. >_<

>Brilliant story! I really feel for Renee and I would like to see this story transcribed into bookform. I for one would definitely buy it!?So please, please continue.
I'm working on the idea of making this a book, but it would have to be self made (which means hand sewn and printed and bound and everything), so yeah. We'll see how that goes.

>that really was a bitter sweet ending wasn't it, i was kinda reminded of it when i read the story in this. aplgirl, I must say this is some amazing work, i just wandered onto elit and this was the first thing i read and im glad it was
Glad you liked it.

>This is a fantastic story and I wish people could, would, be patient. I am hoping that somehow Renee wins through, because I've really grown to love her character. Good luck to you Aplgirl and I hope you are able to finish this story. I would buy it you know if you were to publish it. <3
Thank you :D

>>King of Idiots
>not only do i think she wouldnt mind, i don't belive there is much she could really do about it if she could. just sayin
Pretty much.

>"...Simon fuzzily thought, showers are much, much more entertaining with another person." I fucking love this line
:D
All I can do is look at it now, and think, oh god, the adverb >_<

>>Echo
>Putting this on a blog email me if any objections. you have my email btw. sent you an email about it also.
>me again, i will be putting piece by piece on it eventually i would like to have you as a author of the blog so you can also submit it on there.
Why?
I don't mind, as long as you credit me and link me to the place, but why?
I already have it stored here -> http://archive.elitter.net/wiki/Renee

>i love you aplgirl!!!!
<3
heheh.
>> No. 8728
File: 122488176157.jpg-(37.80KB, 480x640, Beautiful.jpg)
8728
THERE IS A GOD! and this proves it! Amazing fucking update aplgirl, though i still hate Zack with a passion. You got my hopes up with another appearance of sawyer, and squashed them outright, amazing! I'm morbidly curious to see as to what this 'Dan' character will do, but at the same time i don't want anything more to happen to Renee.

As for a critique, i did try to find any errors, but i couldn't. It's just too amazing.

Besides i'm not a very good editor in any case.

-Ahem- i join the masses demanding MOAR!
>> No. 8730
>Despite his distaste, his penis swelled, and he jerked her forward before he could stop himself, burying his member in her member..

>She gagged.

>Horrified, he pushed her back, fiercely repressing the urge to do it again.

>Claude's thrust did it for him. Renee's nose flattened against his groin as she was driven forward.

>Simon tried to brace her the second time, but his grip loosened as her mouth engulfed him, he just...allowed her to go the last inch.

This is the best scene imo.
>> No. 8731
>another appearance of sawyer.

Whoops, meant Simon, typo, my bad.
>> No. 8780
EPIC STICKY BUMP!
>> No. 8783
OKOKOK, new theory time.

Dan's dad is Henry.

Henry killed Simon.

A. Henry finds Renee, and then procedes to rape her.

B. Renee finds Henry, and then procedes to shank him.

I like B. more.

Theory # 2:

Dad's mom is one of the other people that where at claudes party. Who do you think I have in mind?

Same options as A. and B., just insert the name of you know who.

at any rate, these are simple theories, and they mean nothing if i don't get MOAR!, not to rush you or anything :3.
>> No. 8786
I just read this story, it sucks balls that I didn't find it later - then it might be fucking done.
Seriously, this is annoying. -_-
>> No. 8787
OMG, THERE'S MOAR!

this, and a new chapter of berserk just made my day. AMAZING, THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATE! i am eagerly awaiting the day when there is MOAR!
>> No. 8803
>>8787

Oh shit! I hadnt heard about the new berserk
this really is a great day!
>> No. 8835
>>8724

>Thanks. :)

You are most welcome aplgirl, and thank you so much for the interesting update to your story, I'm looking forward to seeing how things progress further with this tale.
>> No. 8938
I know its off topic but since it was already mentioned. Does anyone have a website, bittorent or rapidshare address where I can get the new Berserk Issue.
>> No. 8948
there is moar! And it's great more. Here's hoping Renee gets to kill some asshole the next chapter. And I want to know what happened to Simon pretty bad. Keep going aplgirl
>> No. 8967
Holy shit, I need to stop coming back to read this, so I can just read it in one big story.
>> No. 9080
This story makes me forget fapping, I am so focused on reading. I am unsure of how I feel about that :P
>> No. 9213
noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!
it stopped....
can't wait for moar!!!! aplgirl. i. love. you. (lol, dont tell my boyfriend) you are amazing. as a fellow writer, i am inspired. and you are so great at getting emotions down. (do you know someone who has been raped, or just excees TV and books exposure??)
you should read Of Mice and Men.i teared up.
now pleeease..... post more so i have something to do during the long hours wasted in the arcade of locale bowling alley.
but dont rush yourself of course. and sleep occassionally (i know there cant be that many double letters in that word.....)
work sucks. college and the paying for it sucks. but yay for your sciences!

and i LOVED the scene between renee and simon. ive had a scene like that...... youre amazing.

keep up the great work!!!!!!
>> No. 9214
Fuck I was trying to fap then I get caught up in the story god damn.
>> No. 9290
So, as you know, apl, I just read this entire thing in one sitting.

If things don't turn out good in the end, I will hate you forever. I already hate Zack, Sawyer could be her way to freedom if Zack would stop fucking things up, and goddamnit...

GODDAMNIT.

*curls into a ball cursing in a corner*
>> No. 9293
seriously, fuck yeah. this is one of the best things i've ever read, in general. i know what you've said about publishing this particular story, but you really need to progress into the mainstream, regardless of what you write about.
anyway, incredibly awesome and immersive storyline, it actually feels inspiring for more creative backdrop to be made
>> No. 9297
Wow, read the whole thing in one sitting and missed class the next day. Very nice work. If one thing bugs me it's that I have come to like Renee too much, and it makes it somewhat sadder that we know her so well. She is the 'good guy' and all the while she gets raped in every scene. I guess I'll live with it.
>> No. 9301
>>9297
I know what you mean. You actually feel guilty if you fap to the rape scenes, 'cause it's your beloved Renee being raped.
>> No. 9545
goddamn, this is professional
UPDATE FASTER ARRRGHf kfa rf.kfnd

addicting to say the least, and i'm usually put off by rape
>> No. 9565
I hate this new german law. Fictional stories, containing sex with children, are forbidden now. :(

I am behind over 9000 proxies anyway...

So I need MOAR!
>> No. 9577
no!!!! *cries* i saw new updates and i thought YES! finally moar!!!!! but alas, twas only more comments.....
i still love this. can't wit for moar!!
>> No. 9681
Bump
>> No. 9704
This needs its sticky back..
>> No. 9733
wow, i mean wow, this is absolutely fantastic, im utterly speechless, except for everything i said before this period.
>> No. 9826
whats with having to go to a page other than 0 for this story?
>> No. 10058
HOLY HELL! WTF IS THIS DOIN ON PAGE 4?!?! BUMP!
>> No. 10059
>>8783

There are several flaws with your theory. One is that Henry likes little boy sins, and Dan's dad was mentioned to have a harem of lolis. second is that Henry, while cruel and unusual, does not abuse simon till he breaks down in just a couple months, which Dan's dad was reputed for doing as well. but who knows, he could be Dan's Aunt's cousin's brother's nephew twice removed.
>> No. 10156
courtesy bump
>> No. 10198
can't wait for the next chapter. I came buckets

also bump
>> No. 10217
I fapped to it like 1 mol times.

Also bump.
>> No. 10224
This is a great story and you can really create an atmosphere but I feel so sorry for her, when has the poor kid had enough!
>> No. 10242
>>9704 see >>9837
>> No. 10278
bump
>> No. 10380
this is the best story

do not let this die or there will be hell to pay
>> No. 10383
"Wake up."

Renee flinched into consciousness at Zack's rough grip on her shoulder.

"God dammit, get up," he repeated, all but dragging her out of the closet. "Sauce is going to be here any minute." He tossed pants and a shirt at her, the same clothes she had arrived in, three days past.

If Sawyer's sister ever returned, she was in for a surprise. The boys had stripped her closet of anything their synthetic could remotely fit.

...which had not been all that much. Even with some of Sawyer's clothes, she had barely enough to wear for a week.

Not that I care, she thought, struggling into the plain attire.

"Okay, okay, that's good," Zack led her by the wrist to the front of the house. He never liked it when his friend came inside.

The transport slid to a stop, sunlight streaming off of the chrome finish. Sawyer had barely opened the door before Zack was shoving her inside.

"Dude-"

"My mom left an hour ago," Zack hissed. "She's gonna be back. Go."

"But-"

"Just go."

The slider slammed shut. Renee inched to the far end of the vehicle.

Sawyer frowned at the wall, then sent a silent command to the driving system. The seat buzzed underneath her as the engine whirred.

Silence.

The girl stared at her hands. Despite the relative safety of this boy's company - and she was beginning to accept that he truly intended her no harm - she did not wish to risk more attention.

"How was your weekend?" He finally ventured.

Her mind flashed through the scenes- Zack had little use for her outside of sex- each memory bringing a pit to her stomach. He'd kept her in his closet when he didn't need her. Nothing she could tell Sawyer.

Zack had forbidden her to inform Sawyer of his general neglect and the outright abuse. There was little to tell beyond.

"Fine," she said. She offered no accompanying remark, killing the conversation short.

Sawyer didn't bother to force it. He'd learned that his synthetic, if not reticent by nature, was downright vacuous in the face of questioning. Even his simple inquiries led to her withdrawing from him.

The ride was quiet.

...
>> No. 10384
***

"My parents won't be back for the week." The boy sat in front of the terminal, his silver eye already focusing on the other side.

Renee settled onto the couch.

Sawyer watched her fight the urge to take the book on the end table. She tried to ignore it, at first- she always did. If it weren't for her love of books, he might have believed Zack's insistence that she was no more advanced than the robots that surrounded them on a daily basis.

But robots did what they were programmed to do, and nothing else. They did not have feelings, and it was plainly obvious that the synthetic did. No robot would exhibit a love of reading.

If only he could get her to talk to him.

She didn't trust him, he knew. Sawyer suspected she might even fear him, which would have been funny- but, as her owner, he was beginning to realize that he could do anything to her, and there was no one and no laws to stop him.

It was a chilling thought.

And he wasn't the synthetic. He had a way out of synthetic ownership. Her condition was part of her very being.

The girl took the book, one furtive glance at him- he kept his sight focused on the net- and hunched over it, the quiet joy on her face the only happiness he had seen in the synthetic since they had found her.

A month ago, he would have browsed, with no real purpose. He might have half-heartedly done homework. Or played some games.

None of it would have made him as happy as a book seemed to make her.

He didn't dare interrupt. Tearing her out of the trance, even to ask her something innocuous, would shut down the personality that was unmistakable when she thought he wasn't looking. She'd answer him with a monosyllable.

He knew from experience.

But how, then? Despite her anxiety, despite Zack's assertion that he ought not bother, he did want to understand the girl. To know her, and have her offer the knowledge freely, without coercion or command.

Sociability is not my strength, he thought. Speaking to others, especially girls, left him tongue-tied and uncomfortable. Knowing that she would have to listen would only make it worse. Even light conversation was a chore.

Each phrase was exhausting. Just carrying on an exchange.

And yet-

Renee perused the book, stress leaking from her slight frame as the time crept past. A few curls escaped her shoulder, hiding the smooth skin of her cheek from him. She was beautiful, but he knew he couldn't say it. It was as clear, in every gesture she made, that his advances would be unwanted.

He would not scare the girl.

And yet he didn't know how to calm her.

Sawyer sighed and focused onto the screen.

***

The book perched on her collar-bone, concealing the fragile stretch of her neck and the slight swell of breasts. The blanket he had spread over her, late in the evening, had been thrown off during the night.

Sawyer cleared his throat.

Renee woke instantly, tension flooding her body. Her eyes snapped open and- after meeting his- dropped to his hands. She righted herself slowly, wary as a rabbit might be in the face of a predator.

That a simple act required such fear- that she felt she she should be cautious- almost made him abandon his plan right then.

"Good morning," he said, quiet.

"Good morning," she repeated, the mask already slipping into her speech and across her features. Her face was empty of emotion and fear, but her posture broadcast her unease.

Renee waited, steeling herself for what was to come- what had finally come. She waited for his hands to grab her, for his voice to order her to undress, for the malice and excitement to fill his eyes. It was a relief, almost, for the long delay to end.

He would do as all the masters did. She would no longer need to bother speculating on his motives and intentions.

The hands would be the first sign.

Sawyer leaned back into his chair, fists unclenching and laying casually on his knees. He smiled, false nonchalance better than showing her the jitters threatening to take over his body. He took a deep breath.

"I, um, got you these." He gestured at the table. Upon it lay a few boxes- he should have wrapped them, he realized with a pang.

The girl, after a pause, lifted the packages without any sign of eagerness- and perhaps a little dread.

Renee pulled the top off the first.

"...clothes?" She glanced at him, over the box, meeting his eyes. "But- I already have-"

"None of your own." Sawyer shrugged. An information scan had given him her sizing information. "These will probably fit you better, too."

The garments were simple- two pairs of jeans, a few camisoles, a t-shirt, and sweater. No logos or patterns. He'd considered buying her a dress, but the variety was too daunting.

"You didn't need to- to spend money-"

"Don't worry about it," he said. "Just open the rest."

With trepidation, she pulled the next present to her. It was heavy, though small. And inside-

Her eyebrows rose and genuine surprise stole her features. She slipped her tiny fingers along the edges of the cardboard and let the box fall to the floor.

"You bought me a book," she breathed. She stroked the soft leather cover, outlining the title's grooves. Her breath hitched, one tear escaped her shining eyes and struck the publication.

The expensive old thing suddenly seemed worth every penny. He had stopped at the antique store as an afterthought, the meticulously bound tomes in the window a curiosity from another age; there were plenty of books in his room and online.

"It's not fiction," he said. "I, um, noticed you didn't...know so much about history." He felt the heat rise to his cheeks as stared him, an expression of both delight and confusion on her face.

"The History of the Americas: 1776 to the Present," Renee read. "You don't- I mean-" She swallowed, and met his eyes steadily for the first time. "Can I keep it?" Her voice wavered at the end, ruining an otherwise perfect impression of indifference.

"It's yours." Sawyer grinned. "You can do whatever you want. It could be the start of your own library."

"Thank you," she said, voice soft. She pulled it close to her chest. "I- thank you, Sawyer."

The sincerity of her gratitude summoned a ghost of unease to his stomach. The last box- the first thing he had purchased- now seemed unnecessary.

But he couldn't very well snatch it from under her fingers.

The synthetic opened the tiny box, revealing something worth much more than the book.

Sunlight seemed to make the delicate bracelet glow; then interwoven bands of silver and gold glinting from the case.

"It's beautiful," she said.

"It'll automatically adjust when you put it on, so it won't slip off all the time." He shrugged uncomfortably.

Renee slipped her hand through and the circlet tightened like a noose.

A very pretty noose.

"Thank you," she said. "I...I'm sorry, I don't have anything I can give you."

"Actually, there's something." said Sawyer; he either didn't see or ignored the suspicion that clouded her features. "I want to talk. Not like we have been- I want an actual conversation. Every time I ask you anything you just...clam up, and I don't know why, and I can't change whatever I'm doing if you don't say anything.

"So I have a proposal." He smiled. "Let's trade questions. You ask me something, and I'll answer it to the best of my ability, and then I'll do the same. Okay?"

"...why?"

"You've been living here for weeks, Renee, and I hardly know anything about you."

She glanced away. "I'm your synthetic. It's not like you need to know me."

"But I want to." He shrugged. "I won't force you to tell me stuff you don't want to. But I will tell you whatever you want, and I won't get mad."

"Anything, huh?" She pet the book in her lap, eyes distant. Questions, inquiries she would never have posed to Claude or Zack, rebelled against her better judgment; the last thing she wanted to do was give Sawyer more information about herself. Despite his assurances and gifts, she wouldn't- couldn't risk being hurt more.

But answers could help her escape.

"Why does he call you 'Sauce'?" she asked. That's safe enough.

"Zack?" Sawyer brushed his bangs aside and settled back. "Well, he started doing it when we were kids. You...probably don't remember the escalation, like, fifteen years ago?"

She shook her head.

"Yeah. It was mostly over by the time we were getting old enough to understand it, but people were still being paranoid about anyone asian. You can't tell now, but my grandpa was chinese, and when I was little, I looked it.

"So, I was a little asian looking kid, the only one at our school. I don't think either of us can remember what made him start picking on me, but Zack began following me around- calling me names and stuff. 'Soy Sauce' was his favorite. Sawyer, Soy- you know?"

"He calls you a name he used to mock you with?"

Sawyer held up a hand. "My turn." His smile faded. "Why are you afraid of me?"

"I'm not afraid of you," she said.

Too quick, she thought, the silence a plain indicator of his skepticism. She shifted uncomfortably under his steady gaze.

"You aren't?"

"No," she said, willing conviction into the answer.

"I walk into the room and you flinch, Renee." Sawyer bit his lip and leaned forward. "I talk to you, and you mumble one word answers. I just look at you, and you practically turn into a brick, the way you tense up.

"If that isn't fear, I don't know what else to call it."

"...how do you want me to act?" she whispered.

"I don't," he snapped. He took a breath and leaned across the table, waiting until she met his eyes. "Renee, I don't want you to act, but I don't want you to fear me, either. I don't understand why." He sighed. "Okay, yes, I know that you have to listen to me, but you must see that I won't make you do anything you don't want to."

"But you always could." She shook her head. "Whatever you intend, it doesn't matter. I have to obey, because you own me. I must. You could- could just command me to not move from where I sit now, and my body would comply, no matter how much I'd try to get up." She bowed her head.

"You could put food and water just out of reach," she continued, "-and no matter how hungry and thirsty I was, I wouldn't be able to reach it. Even when my mind gets cloudy.

"You could forget about me, and I wouldn't be able to get up, not- not even to use the bathroom. Not without your permission." The words rolled out of her, as unstoppable as a forest fire.

"You have power over me that I cannot fight, and I have tried. Not using it doesn't make you safe, because you still have it. At any point in time- maybe you're just having a bad day, or maybe you finally start listening to Zack and stop caring- you could hurt me.

"I'm a synthetic. I can't fight you. I can't run away. I can't even kill myself without you telling me to.

"So don't tell me not to be afraid, Sawyer." She exhaled slowly and forced her fists to open. "My fear is justified. Maybe once you get a better program, one that can control me better, you can take it. But my emotions are the one thing that separates me from the robots that clean your floor, and I will not give them to you."

Renee didn't dare look up from the book in her hands, her stomach a knot. Throwing anger into the face of her master was a surefire way to incur punishment.

But no blows fell.

After an eternity, she ventured a peek.

His mismatched eyes bored into her, so intent they seemed to burn.

"Is that what he did?" he asked. "Monty- Montague. Is that what he did to you?"

"He did worse."

Sawyer broke the connection. He reached out a hand, across the table, then seemed to think better of it and withdrew. "I'm sorry," he muttered.

"I don't need you to feel sorry for me. You wanted to know the reason I'm on edge all the time- well, there you go." She drew the blanket around her, stared at the book in her lap. "You could set me free."

"That's...impossible," he said. "If you weren't registered to someone, you'd shut down- like you were when I found you."

"There has to be a way to bypass it. Humans designed synthetics, and they aren't infallible."

"Renee, synthetics have been here for a hundred years. They'd have worked out the kinks by now."

"But say it's possible; say I could live my own life- would you let me go?"

Silence. Answer enough.

"Is it really so bad, being here?" he asked.

It's not you, she thought.

The girl threw off the blanket and stood, stretching stiff muscles. "Why are you and Zack friends?" She asked the question casually, but the personality contrast between the two had been eating at her for weeks.

Sawyer blinked at the topic change. "Um...well, we weren't when we were younger. Zack used to...harass me at school."

"How did you make him stop?"

"I lost it one day. I can't remember why, now. But he was being a dick, and I just laid into him." He chuckled. "He was black and blue for weeks."

Damn. She'd never be able to beat the boy into submission.

"After that," Sawyer continued, "Zack decided he wanted to be my friend."

"I see."

Renee wandered from the couch, the book- her book cradled in her arms. The silence embraced her, comfortable despite Sawyer's presence.

Until he broke it.

"Would you have sex with me?" he blurted out. The question broke the brief quiet like a bomb in peacetime.

The serenity she had felt vanished as anxiety surged into her belly, the familiar sensation stopping her cold. A shiver ran through her spine, the betrayal like a physical blow.

It's not a betrayal, she told herself. Did you really think a book and a few trinkets meant he cared? Come now, Renee. You know better than that.

The silence buried her.

"I mean-" he stuttered, "I mean not now, but someday. Is it a- a possibility?"

"No," she said. It was a hair's breath from a whisper. The girl inhaled and spun around. She met his gaze, her emotions churning inside of her. "Not unless you forced me."

His eyes widened at the declaration. "I wouldn't-"

"Right," said Renee. "I already told you. You understand that all it'd take is one command. You'd just have to tell me not to fight, or to be quiet, or to enjoy myself. I'm a synthetic, I can't make you stop."

"You won't have to," he said, but she was shaking her head, the constant fear and conviction he hadn't quite recognized, before, relayed through her body. "Renee, I swear-"

You can't trust anyone, her mind admonished, and especially someone who owns you. They might not recognize it at first, but they'll consider you as less than human. Owners have power; it only makes sense that they'll use it. That they must, eventually.

And he owns me. He's already thought about sex, all he needs to-

Sawyer grasped her shoulders, cutting off the torrent of thought. He crouched down and looked through his lashes to meet her eyes.

"Renee, I swear," he said. "I swear, I will never force you or order you to have sex with me. I'd only want it if you wanted it, too."

"I won't," she said.

The boy sighed and bowed his head. "Is it because you're afraid of me...or is it because of Simon?"

---

Only a month behind the last one. >_< I'll respond to comments tomorrow, I need to do some chemistry right now. :/
>> No. 10393
OH FUCK YEAH! god damn i love this story, so elequently written, its just so amazing! i cry with the masses for MOAR good madam! MOAR!
>> No. 10398
"Is it because you're afraid of me...or is it because of Simon?"

*gasp!*
>> No. 10406
>>10384

Another lovely update aplgirl, thank you for this.

Also, if Sawyer knows about Simon that must mean he's been looking into Renee's memories (while she was reading her new book perhaps?) which must presumably mean that he also has a very good idea of what Zack got up to when he borrowed Renee for the weekend.
>> No. 10407
MANLY TEARS
>> No. 10421
Ah, this update was more satisfying than a dozen sex scenes.
>> No. 10433
This is a great story, it's always more satisfying to see something develop that has been so long coming.
>> No. 10434
>The Yank
>>8728
Yeah, now we're getting down to the tricky parts. We'll see how well I can pull this whole thing off. <_<

>>8730
I am glad you liked it.

I have difficulty reading the past stuff I wrote. :(

>King of Idiots
>>8783
I like your ideas, and even thought about altering my current plans for them...

But I think I'll stick with the outline. :D

>>8786
>I just read this story, it sucks balls that I didn't find it later - then it might be fucking done.
>Seriously, this is annoying. -_-
But having people want to read it is one of the reasons I feel I have to finish. :O

>>8787
Welp, here is the more. :D

>>8948
>there is moar! And it's great more. Here's hoping Renee gets to kill some asshole the next chapter. And I want to know what happened to Simon pretty bad. Keep going aplgirl
No killin' in this chapter, I'm afraid. We'll find out about Simon's fate...eventually.

>>9214
>Fuck I was trying to fap then I get caught up in the story god damn.
:P
I hope that is a good thing.

>>9080
>This story makes me forget fapping, I am so focused on reading. I am unsure of how I feel about that :P
hehehe.
Feel...good?

>chiisuchi
>>9213
>noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!
>it stopped....
>can't wait for moar!!!! aplgirl. i. love. you. (lol, dont tell my boyfriend) you are amazing. as a fellow writer, i am inspired. and you are so great at getting emotions down. (do you know someone who has been raped, or just excees TV and books exposure??)
>you should read Of Mice and Men.i teared up.
>now pleeease..... post more so i have something to do during the long hours wasted in the arcade of locale bowling alley.
>but dont rush yourself of course. and sleep occassionally (i know there cant be that many double letters in that word.....)
>work sucks. college and the paying for it sucks. but yay for your sciences!
>and i LOVED the scene between renee and simon. ive had a scene like that...... youre amazing.
>keep up the great work!!!!!!
XD
Out of curiosity, have you told your boyfriend that you read this? I'm just wondering, since I'm not sure I'd share it with any of my future partners. :/

I don't know anyone directly who has been raped (at least to my knowledge). If I did, I might have more trouble writing this.

I do know that I can't show this to most of my friends. Two of them expressed shock and incomprehension at the idea of a girl ever having rape fantasies. *shrug*

I will read Of Mice and Men, someday. I tend to avoid the 'classics.'

Thanks for the lengthy message. :)

>Melbourne Hatfield
>>9290
>So, as you know, apl, I just read this entire thing in one sitting.
>If things don't turn out good in the end, I will hate you forever. I already hate Zack, Sawyer could be her way to freedom if Zack would stop fucking things up, and goddamnit...
>GODDAMNIT.
>*curls into a ball cursing in a corner*
I like happy endings, when I read.

I hope you keep reading this to find out how it ends.

And I am glad it tugs at your emotions. :P

>Haddy
>>9293
>seriously, fuck yeah. this is one of the best things i've ever read, in general. i know what you've said about publishing this particular story, but you really need to progress into the mainstream, regardless of what you write about.
>anyway, incredibly awesome and immersive storyline, it actually feels inspiring for more creative backdrop to be made
I hope people like the world I've made. Or, well, if they at least don't like it, it makes sense and is somewhat believable.
I've got a vague idea of a different story to work on, after I finish this.

And maybe someday, I'll do a sequel.

>>9297
>Wow, read the whole thing in one sitting and missed class the next day. Very nice work. If one thing bugs me it's that I have come to like Renee too much, and it makes it somewhat sadder that we know her so well. She is the 'good guy' and all the while she gets raped in every scene. I guess I'll live with it.
I hope it wasn't an important class. :/

And yeah...it's kinda hard to balance the 'story' with the original purpose of this- a rape piece that didn't have the victim suddenly start liking it, or the "rapist" was secretly her husband, or whatever. Those stories usually annoy me.

So I decided to try and see if I could do better.

Luckily, I think the number of rape scenes and stuff isn't unbelievable.

>>9301
>I know what you mean. You actually feel guilty if you fap to the rape scenes, 'cause it's your beloved Renee being raped.
I hope you liked this update, then. :)

>argon
>>9545
>goddamn, this is professional
>UPDATE FASTER ARRRGHf kfa rf.kfnd
>addicting to say the least, and i'm usually put off by rape
Well, the faster I update, the closer to the end we get. <_<
I'm glad you still enjoy it, even if you are put off by rape.

>>9565
>I hate this new german law. Fictional stories, containing sex with children, are forbidden now. :(
>I am behind over 9000 proxies anyway...
>So I need MOAR!
Seriously? What did they do about Lolita? Or One Hundred Years of Solitude? Granted, they aren't nearly as explicit as this...but it's all fiction, anyways. :/

>chiisuchi
>>9577
>no!!!! *cries* i saw new updates and i thought YES! finally moar!!!!! but alas, twas only more comments.....
>i still love this. can't wit for moar!!
More delivered :)

>Geonisis
>>9733
>wow, i mean wow, this is absolutely fantastic, im utterly speechless, except for everything i said before this period.
heheheh
And thank you :D

>The Yank
>>10059
>There are several flaws with your theory. One is that Henry likes little boy sins, and Dan's dad was mentioned to have a harem of lolis. second is that Henry, while cruel and unusual, does not abuse simon till he breaks down in just a couple months, which Dan's dad was reputed for doing as well. but who knows, he could be Dan's Aunt's cousin's brother's nephew twice removed.
Nice counter-argument.
You're right about Henry- he doesn't break his synthetics down that quickly. Playing with their memories does have a detrimental effect, though.

>Halcyon
>>10224
>This is a great story and you can really create an atmosphere but I feel so sorry for her, when has the poor kid had enough!
You know you love it when the protagonist goes through the gauntlet. o_o

My favorite books always make me feel awful for whatever horribleness the main characters are going through.

>>10380
>this is the best story
>do not let this die or there will be hell to pay
It has not died. :D

>The Yank
>>10393
>OH FUCK YEAH! god damn i love this story, so elequently written, its just so amazing! i cry with the masses for MOAR good madam! MOAR!
XD

>>10398
>"Is it because you're afraid of me...or is it because of Simon?"
>*gasp!*
I almost added the next part, but then I realized it was the best cliffhanger ending. XD

...and it meant I could post sooner. <_<

>The Storyteller
>>10406
>Another lovely update aplgirl, thank you for this.
>Also, if Sawyer knows about Simon that must mean he's been looking into Renee's memories (while she was reading her new book perhaps?) which must presumably mean that he also has a very good idea of what Zack got up to when he borrowed Renee for the weekend.
I am glad you enjoyed it. :)

We shall see what happens next. <_<

>>10421
>MANLY TEARS
<_>

>>10421
>Ah, this update was more satisfying than a dozen sex scenes.
I am glad. With the crapload of scenes in the previous one, I figured less would be okay.

This update could still use some more rounds of editing from me, but...I'll do it all later.

>Halcyon
>>10433
>This is a great story, it's always more satisfying to see something develop that has been so long coming.
And we aren't even at the end, yet. :O

---
And that's all, folks. I'll reply to comments after this point in irc, or after the next segment.

Or you could email me. *shrug*

XD
>> No. 10437
Your response to comments is humbling and makes the rest of us look bad :S in a good way. And right on with the gauntlet, Renee has sure run a big one, hopefully this means she gets the best prize at the end...
>> No. 10439
one of the reasons i love this story is because it isn't one where the girl being raped suddenly starts liking it, or where it turns out to be staged. that said, i'm no longer reading it for the rape but because i want to see what happens to renee. poor girl.

i showed this to my boyfriend and he read the first few posts and said he was rather disturbed by it, lol.
>> No. 10460
Lol. I remember wanking to this.
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